I’ve given up writing several times now. One of the most
memorable periods of quitting started on November 9th, 2016 (I’m
fairly sure I stopped doing a lot of other things that brought me joy then too).
At first, it wasn’t an entirely conscious choice to quit writing, but once I
realized I had stopped, I stubbornly refused to start. When I caught myself
scribbling ideas for future stories in a notebook a few weeks later, I knew that as
mad and as sad as I was, I’d be writing again soon.
Since then, I’ve written a book, but I’d be lying if I said
I hadn’t “quit” a few times before and after the damn thing was finished.
Writing can be frustrating and a little isolating at times. It doesn’t always
have to take a national crisis to make someone ask themselves, “What’s the
point?”
I was on the verge of quitting again a couple of weeks ago when
a reader reached out to me. She had purchased a physical copy of my book some
time ago but hadn’t had a chance to read it until recently. Unfortunately, she
had to be in a hospital recently and my book was one of the things she brought,
figuring it would last her during the whole stay.
She loved it so much she finished it in a day.
The thing that moved me most was that she said that my book
made what was an otherwise scary experience a little easier to bear. She even
read some passages out loud to others when they asked about what she was
reading.
I have no expectations of becoming some great literary icon.
But if my words can shine a little light when things are dark for others, if
they can give people one reason to smile when there are so many reasons not to…well,
that makes me smile.
I probably will not quit this week. I may not quit this month. But when sadness and anxiety manage to get the upper hand on me, I’ll read those messages again, as well as what she said on Amazon and Goodreads.
And then, I’ll get to writing.
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| Photo by Aziz Acharki on Unsplash |
Song Choice: Don't Give Up by Peter Gabriel featuring Kate Bush
This post was created for the prompt given at Poets and Storytellers United's Weekly Scribblings, What Makes You Smile?
"my words can shine a little light when things are dark for others..."
ReplyDeleteI think that a pretty fine reason to write
Happy Wednesday
Much💝love
I echo your sentiments.
DeleteIt's quite fine indeed
DeleteI think maybe others of us have been there too a few times. (Smile. ... Oh look, that in itself made me smile! I'll add fellow-feeling to the list of things that do it for me.)
ReplyDeleteI think for me writing is the thing I can't not do, no matter how
often I may feel like quitting or think that my writing doesn't matter. We forget sometimes that really we do it for its own sake, and whether (or how) it matters to anyone else is largely out of our hands. And then, there are those times when we find out it has indeed made a difference to someone, and even if it's only one person, that's such a gift to be able to do that. And suddenly that's enough, and more than enough.
It really is something that just feels wired into us. Even before I got that sweet message, I knew that there was no permanent quitting, because if it didn't take after Nov 2016, I likely was never really going to quit. But boy, did getting that message really light a fire in me. LOL, it's feeling like a novel length fire.
DeleteThat is the best choice of music for your piece, Rommy, I love that duet so much. A writer can never give up writing for long, but we all need a break every now and then. I like the old saying, ‘a change is as good as a rest’ and change genre from time to time. Notebooks are so handy. I’m taking one with me to my daughter’s on Sunday as I’ll be leaving the laptop at home and will be off the radar for a week. How wonderful that a reader contacted you after reading your book! The best encouragement to not give up and the best reason to smile.
ReplyDeleteNotebooks are the best! LOL, I am very much a creature of the modern era and do most of the polishing of my writing on my laptop. But sometimes what I really need is to quit the internet, not writing, LOL. And notebooks are perfect for those moments.
DeleteThis is incredibly heartfelt, Rommy! Writing is like unconsciously wired into our brains so we can't stay away from it for long. But yes, when sadness and anxiety threaten to engulf us it becomes difficult, (I should know I have been there a few times) 💝 Here's to writing to our heart's content and never letting anything get in between 🍷😍
ReplyDeleteMy longest break was the one I mentioned, back in 2016. I am glad I took it, because there were a lot of subtle seeds of ideas-to-be planted then, and I'm still harvesting. But stay away permanently? Nah. :D
DeleteThat's just so great! What a wonderful affirmation for any writer to receive!
ReplyDeleteIt was the glass of water in a desert that I really needed.
DeleteI can't even spell QUIT. I wish I could (spell it, that is).
ReplyDeleteHuzzah for spellcheck! What would we do without it? :D
DeleteWe all quit at one point or another...but we can't because it's who we are...and what could be better than shinning the light in someone's darkest hour.
ReplyDeleteI was very moved by the message. It is one of the greatest honors I can imagine.
DeleteGood luck on your writing break. I know it is hard to stop as I am officially on a writing break of my own. But prompts like yours are sooo enticing that as long as readers will read and comment I keep on. I have several persona, cars, house, income tax, professional education, and more that must be done. On my other active blog I feel obligated to a fellow senior who posts a Friday alphabet pictorial meme and then I feel that I must write at least one verses work. Sabatical?? Hardly but in name alone.
ReplyDelete..
I took a brief break until September, but could not resist penning a “55” for Joy. I get how you feel the pull of obligation. Easier to give in, embrace it!
DeleteLOL, it's funny too, how when we really mean to take a break we just end up writing again. Writers are a funny lot.
DeletePerhaps only the best writers think this way while others scribble away and produce nothing of note.
ReplyDeleteI *hope* I'm a good writer, but I'd better keep on writing regularly for practice, just to be sure. :D
DeleteWriting is hard because it demands so many things from us, one of those being courage. But I believe it is words of appreciation such as these (even if from a single reader) that keeps us going. And that your book has uplifted someone's spirit in their time of need is definitely something to smile about. Remember those words or reviews, when you feel like quitting!
ReplyDeleteWhen I'm "in the zone" writing is just pure fun...playing around with stories and characters to get the feel just right. Sharing that...*gulp*. That's where the bravery comes in. But I'm glad I was brave enough to keep putting things out there and that it helped make someone's day better.
DeleteWhat a beautifully inspiring thing to know how much your writing helped ... keep on keeping on!
ReplyDeleteI certainly plan to!
Deletea fine reassurance, Rommy, that words continue on whether we swim their current or not ~
ReplyDeleteI'm grabbing a floaty and diving on in!
DeleteI'm smiling as I read your story. Keep writing!
ReplyDeleteWoot! Thanks!
DeletePS I have your book as an ebook (since quite some time ago) and I love it too.
ReplyDeleteYay! I'm glad you liked it.
Deletethe need to write is a force unto itself but the joy of even one reader makes the process worthwhile... what a lovely gift your words were to the reader! Love this.
ReplyDeleteIt's just such a rush to know that those words you sent out into the world found a place where they are loved.
DeleteOh yes, dont give up writing. I enjoy reading what flows from your pen, at least here. I havent read your book yet. Only because I think it might be super fantasy, and I just cant wrap that. Yet. Though I like it here. I think humans go through mind issues. I have given up painting, for instance(something I have been doing since about age 12), at least three times. Put all my paints, brushes, easels, stored paintings, etc on the curb (always picked up by someone quickly) and then three months later I am hit...hit...with an exciting painting idea and have to go to the expense of buying stuff all over again. I'm kinda there right now. Just hesitant to give it all up because of past memories. Who knows? I've never given up writing though. It comes and goes but I never "delete" all my "stuff". I use it. Make stories. Paint stories. It is one thing that stays with me, sort of in the background. So dont. Keep it. Its part of you.
ReplyDeleteOof. I have gotten to the point where I wanted to toss everything I associate with writing. This is ridiculous because a.) I still need my laptop and b.) I have books in every room (yes even my bathroom). And just as you describe, eventually an idea just will not let me be until I play with it on paper. I don't know what your creative future holds in store for you, but I hope the next time you pick up a brush it's with a feeling of joy and curiosity to see what comes next.
DeleteAdmittedly the first three stories in my collection definitely have a traditional(-ish) fantasy feel to them. I purposely arranged them in order from most classical to more modern/ urban-fantasy. Thank you for taking the time to read what I write here. All I can say is if you enjoy the usual sort of stories I write here, you'll find the ones in the collection have a similar feel to them. :) Thank you for your kind words and thoughtful comments.
Happy Sunday Rommy
ReplyDeleteMuch💝love
To you as well
DeleteOh my goodness this was so beautiful to read and i really loved these words from you:
ReplyDeleteI have no expectations of becoming some great literary icon. But if my words can shine a little light when things are dark for others, if they can give people one reason to smile when there are so many reasons not to…well, that makes me smile.
it's good advice for writers who take their careers seriously. i applause this from you very much. thanks and thanks so much.
I am so glad you like it!
DeleteSomeone very smart (and extremely good looking) shared a great truth: "Every reader that loves your words is a reason to build a world." Okay, so I was the one who said it, but that doesn't mean that it isn't true all the way. I am so glad the reader shared her experience. You both gained something--you were reminded that your words matter, and she found a way to see a bit of light in the dark.
ReplyDeleteHa! I do recall that conversation. But I'm so glad she shared her words. A certain fox may be coming out of hibernation soon. ;)
DeleteYou chronicle the struggle to write beautifully. Basho himself described the cycles of enthusiasm and depression through which he lived as he pursued his way of poetry. Bravo, for honestly telling it--and for continuting to write again and again.
ReplyDeleteThanks Frank
DeleteHow wonderful to get positive feedback and know something you've written was meaningful to another. That's the stuff that keeps us all putting pen to paper!
ReplyDeleteIt really is
DeleteI quit everyday and this reminds me of the lines from "Airplane!" - "I picked the wrong day to stop..." Kidding aside, I'm glad your words have brought joy to someone. I believe that is a great reward.
ReplyDeleteLOL, I remember that scene from Airplane!
DeleteOh, I have walked down the never going to write again path many times. A horrible act of violence hit our family right as Covid arrived. Writing at this time and exploring my other creative avenues has been my salvation. I'm so glad you didn't quit. Your work was exactly what the lady needed. So blessed to read your work.
ReplyDelete