There's a guy in my work group (I never know if it's more proper to refer to him as co-worker or boss, because although he isn't technically my supervisor, a lot of the work I do gets coordinated through him). He's been with the love of his life almost as long as the hubby and I have been together (them around 15 years, us a little over 18). And while he could probably get away with sweet talking his significant other in the office, outside of work it'd be a different story. Despite the amazing and wonderful decisions the Supreme Court announced this morning, in the eyes of Pennsylvania law, his relationship doesn't have the same validity as mine.
It's a huge step we've made as a county today, but it's only one step. Heck, there are a number of steps to go with the way my marriage is viewed. You see, I'm Latina and my husband is of Eastern European (Ashkenazi) Jewish descent. Not too long ago there was a big kerfuffle over a cereal commercial featuring an intermarried couple. It seems some folks still aren't ready for that, even in 2013.
My kids shrug when I try to tell them how important this decision is. Why does it matter to anyone who someone else chooses to marry? It's not a big deal to them. They've had the luxury of growing up in an extremely racially diverse family, in a fairly tolerant Northeastern suburb. It's not a giant jump of logic to understand that if love knows no racial boundaries, then there shouldn't be any gender boundaries. It's weird to them people care at all. They also don't go around thinking "I'm a biracial kid" or "My parents have an interracial relationship" (I actually did stop my son to ask that). It occurs to them that yes, their parents are from different completely cultures, but although there is a distinct difference between a Brooklyn and a Peruvian accent, at the end of the day, the grandparents from both cultures just want to fatten them up.
I look forward to the day when kids being raised by gay parents just shrug things off and don't think that their family is all that different from everyone else's. It's nice thinking of a future where there's a commercial with a gay couple and no one thinks anything of it, because it's a pretty commonly accepted thing. No, we so aren't there yet. But we're a bit closer. I saw all the memes this morning, read a bunch of headlines, but nothing quite touched me until I read the aforementioned co-worker's/ boss's facebook status:
June 26th. History has been made. Thank you.
I cried a bit when I read that. Hell, I'm misting up now just re-typing it. Because in the end, it's really all the same love.