The Best Worst Thing: Blogging Around with Rommy, Week 39


When my high school sweetheart told me he wanted to break up with me "to date more classically beautiful women" it came as something of a blow. Yeah, even after people told me that high school relationships don't last, and that goes double for ones that turn into long distance things when people go off to college. What can I say? I was kind of clueless when I was young. There were warning signs things weren't rock solid between us, but it took that pronouncement to make things 100% clear it was over.

Of course I cried. I raged. My grades wobbled (the death blow arrived right before finals). Meals came and went untouched. Then one day I took a deep breath and looked at the new reality I found myself in. I didn't have to run back home every weekend anymore. I could be part of college life on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday nights. I started to realize there was a whole side of myself I never let myself explore, because I had made some pretty big assumptions about what I thought my life was going to be like. 

I took art classes. I liked them enough to decide to minor in them. I started learning about religious traditions other than the one I was born into. I kept exploring them for years afterwards until I could admit to myself my path was more something to be sought by starlight than from a church pew. I started talking to the guy who lived one floor below me in the dorms. He was funny, sweet, and always had a mug of coffee ready for me. Dear reader, I married him. Today we're celebrating the birthday of our oldest child and we'll be married 25 years next May.

That I ever hoped that I could patch things up with my ex seems hysterical now. The other thing that's funny--he's the one who wanted to be a writer back then. Yeah, sometimes your world ends, but that can end up being the best worst thing that can happen.

Song Choice: So Much Better from the musical Legally Blonde


This article was created for Poets United's Moonlight Musings. So dear Groovers, care to talk about some of your best worst things? Let's chat about in the comments section!
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23 comments:

  1. Rosemary Nissen-WadeOctober 18, 2019 at 7:17 AM

    Great story and great outcome!

    (I'm guessing your ex did not become a writer?)

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  2. dsnake1October 18, 2019 at 9:26 AM

    great post!
    we won't know how our paths will wind but it looks like yours is not too bad. :)

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  3. Debra She Who SeeksOctober 18, 2019 at 11:27 AM

    "The first cut is the deepest" -- and look at the wonderful YOU who emerged from it!

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    Replies
    1. RommyOctober 18, 2019 at 2:47 PM

      Yeah, I was a straight up mopey mess. But damn if it didn't kick start a whole lot of good things for me!

      Delete
  4. Magaly GuerreroOctober 18, 2019 at 12:35 PM

    First, your title is brilliant. Now, to the rest of the words...

    I will never understand the phrase "classically beautiful". According to whom? is the first thought that comes to mind. But I do appreciate what such pronouncement tells me about the individual who speaks it--to me, it says that their mind and world are extremely small. I am so glad you didn't have to spend the rest of your life with someone who existed in such a tiny place. Also, I'm sure your sexy beast of a man and I are better because of that change that hurt so much (then).

    Happiest of Birthdays, to Max!

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  5. Sherry Blue SkyOctober 18, 2019 at 1:14 PM

    Anyone who offers THAT as a reason for breaking up with someone is someone well rid of. My goodness! As Magaly points out, that says so much about his shallow values. So glad that left you free to find your kind, sweet husband.

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    Replies
    1. RommyOctober 18, 2019 at 2:50 PM

      Teenagers can be pretty shallow creatures in general, but yes, thank goodness for me getting to know the guy downstairs a bit better.

      Delete
  6. MarjaOctober 18, 2019 at 3:48 PM

    Ah you got someone better thanks to it. He was unworthy of you anyway. Happy birthday to your child and congratulations of being together nearly 25 years. That's great

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    Replies
    1. RommyOctober 19, 2019 at 8:37 AM

      I am very thankful for how things ended up.

      Delete
  7. Revived WriterOctober 18, 2019 at 4:27 PM

    Thanks for sharing this, and I agree with your conclusion.

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  8. Sanaa RizviOctober 18, 2019 at 4:38 PM

    Twenty-five years!! Many congratulations in advance, Rommy!❤️ This is a heartening write and there is a lot that I resonate with there. My best-worst experience was breaking up with a guy I was madly in love with for five long years and realizing the importance of letting go. Sometimes we tend to chase the people who seem sincere on the outside (but aren't so on the inside) and we being young and clueless are unable to distinguish right from wrong.❤️

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    Replies
    1. RommyOctober 19, 2019 at 8:41 AM

      Yeah, for our own sanity we have to learn to let go of the things that really don't serve us, and see what else is out there.

      Delete
  9. Khaya RonkainenOctober 19, 2019 at 11:08 AM

    Oh, the days of crying over high school sweethearts! I so relate. Sometimes what we want is not what we need, and when we finally get that wonderful things happen. I love happy endings. :D A birthday wishes to your eldest!

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    1. RommyOctober 25, 2019 at 10:02 AM

      It was a very happy ending :) LOL, you couldn't have told me that the day it happened but it all worked out.

      Delete
  10. LoriOctober 19, 2019 at 12:59 PM

    "The best worst thing to ever happen" how something feels so tragic at the time and it ends up being the best thing that could have happened. I love how that release allowed you to explore. Now it seems things are better and better! Felicitations on your celebrations!

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    Replies
    1. RommyOctober 25, 2019 at 10:07 AM

      It was deeply tragic to 19 year old me. 47 year old me knows much better. :D

      Delete
  11. J COctober 21, 2019 at 12:05 PM

    I loved your story. Its perfect! Thanks for sharing it because it makes for a smile and some happy time.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Magic Love CrowOctober 27, 2019 at 5:49 PM

    Yes, Yes, Yes!!!!!!! I could write a book right now! LOL! I have been down that rabbit hole so many times, and I can truly understand now, why everything happened the way it did and I am so happy and grateful!
    Just the other day, when I was coming home from work, I smiled and thanked my ex, for breaking up with me in 2015. I never heard from him again. That was the first time in my life I actually smiled and laughed about him!
    I feel so good Rommy! Other things have been happening around me and it's kind of freaking me out, LOL, but it's all good!
    Big Hugs!
    Happy Birthday to your oldest and Happy early 25 years!

    ReplyDelete

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