Bridge Out: Blogging Around with Rommy, Week 30

Photo by Giancarlo Revolledo on Unsplash


I can't build bridges
when people steal the supplies
and hit me with them.

This poem is linked to the Tuesday Platform at Imaginary Gardens with Real Toads.



Liner Notes for this Groove: One of the casualties of 2016 was my patience. Before then, I prided myself on being something of a bridge builder, of being open to hearing a wide range of views.  Like David Stuart Davies wrote in A Taste for Blood, "I'm anybody's for a cuppa and a biscuit.” Or at least, so I thought.

I still aspire to that some days. I want to engage in respectful discourse where the point isn’t to “win” a conversation, but to reach an understanding. If I have the emotional energy for it, I will. Because despite how angry I can get, I still think that it’s going to be well-nigh impossible for society as a whole to move forward if more of that doesn’t happen. *rubs her temples and reaches for ibuprofen when she thinks about all the times people were quick to mouth off instead of paid attention to the actual words exchanged* 

But my time is too precious to engage with the willfully ignorant, with those who can’t be bothered to fact check. I’m not going to go out of my way to keep people like that in my life or spend much time with them either. My mental health is also too precious for that. 


40 comments:

  1. Yes, some people are not interested in bridges except to throw other people off them.

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    1. Agreed. And that's a really awesome and darkly humorous way to phrase it. I think I will steal that expression. *snickers over tea*

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  2. There was a twitter debate recently about how people were losing friends (and even family) over differences of opinion.. about things that could very well be discussed amicably over tea...

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    1. Well... look, I will listen to substantive arguments. But in the U.S., things are fairly, well, awful.

      I will not say that there aren't those who are more or less in alignment with my views that fail to do their due diligence when it comes to discernment or critical thinking. There most certainly are. But their arguments don't regularly rest upon the dehumanization of people. And when the discussion gets to *that* point, and only distorted or downright inaccurate "facts" get parroted, yeah...my time would be more productively spent trying to teach my dog calculus.

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  3. I know the problem, Rommy. It's easier to build bridges when the other person meets you in the middle.

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  4. I have been through cycles of this... actually in the 70s i had similar type of discussions with Marxist friends I now have with people leaning to the right... sometimes you can still reach through, but it takes an effort from everyone.

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    1. I have an emotional and mental spoon shortage when it comes to that though, so I engage only when I know I have the energy for it. Otherwise, I'm off to explain L'Hopital's rule to Kit.

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  5. I like your bridge senyru. A bridge suggests a meeting at the middle or close Whether it be in the building, travel, or a prearranged meeting. Not so many bridges are built any more, too hard the environment.
    ..

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    1. I imagine this is a feeling that is not unknown to a bunch of folks these days.

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    1. Thanks Sherry. LOL, sometimes I surprise myself.

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  8. Rommy, I have to tell you...I love your recent poems (haiku/senryu): Halved and this one, among others. I feel there's a bigger story here. Did you say you were working on a collection of poems? LOL...I just made that one up. But think about it!

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    1. I actually had made a lot of progress in putting together a book of poetry. I'd say I'm roughly 3/4 of the way through the compilation process. But I've stalled out a little over the summer.

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  9. Sadly we must accept there are fools in this world that can make life difficult both for us and others. Mostly we can avoid them but at work or at leisure watch out they're always close by.

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    1. Too true. And my temper is such that walking away really is the smartest thing to do sometimes.

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  10. I, too, opt for sanity (and for not getting smack to death by bridge building supplies). The alternative is too expensive. And we are the ones who cover most of the cost.

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  11. Great poem! liked it thank you.

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  12. The frustration, indignation and beautifully crafted phrasing of truth. I am blown away by these three little lines. How brilliantly you have put this.

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  13. Yes indeed you said it thd way it ought to be said. Gorgeous haibun

    Thank you for dropping by my sumie Sunday today

    Much❤🕊❤love

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  14. Nowadays most people are more concerned about being right rather than listening to and understanding another's point of view and facts. I fear this is the era of ignorance and selfishness. Poignant write, Rommy 💖💖

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    1. It's almost like a drug, isn't it? People get off on that high, thinking they are right and will delude themselves thoroughly to hold on to that feeling.

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  15. I love this. It reminds me of the difference between good faith "have you thought about what you're saying" arguments and their opposite "how can I make you hang up vowing never to speak to me again" trolling. A perfect mental image to help laugh off (ruefully, probably painfully) the trolls.

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    1. LOL, at the "how can I make you hang up". That's pretty much spot on. I also like to think of their trollish tummies growling when their favorite food (attention) is denied. I'm petty that way.

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  16. I'm with you there. Ignorant people should be avoided at all costs. It's a waste of time tring to enlighten them sheeeesh!

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    1. I may as well run into a wall to save time and get the headache over with, than go the slow route towards headache land by engaging with the ignorant.

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  17. What truth! Simple and direct. Packs a wallop.

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  18. I don't for one minute believe that the world is full of narcissists, but I do believe that, more and more, western society seems to be hot-wiring people (from birth) to be more ego-centric than they once were … they kind of live in a world, unto themselves, where they do not question: who they are, what they want, or want they think. It is very hard to build bridges with individuals 'programmed' this way. This is a big problem. Parents and educators have got to start talking about COMMUNICATION: how it works and what it can achieve - because without the ability to give and receive communication (to communicate) there will be a lot few bridges built.

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    1. I'd like to think I've done a good job of that with my kids. Maybe it's just that I got lucky being a big kid myself, but communication always flows well after playing some video games together, sharing music, or just goofing around. I hope they grow up to be bridge builders. They've inspired me more than once to take up my tools and try again already. :)

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